Aftershock
by Shunsoku
Summary: Satoshi and Daisuke come to some startling conclusions following the events of the anime. Contains spoilers. Final chapter now up!
1. Chapter 1

**Aftershock**

**By: **Shunsoku

**Disclaimer: **I do not own DN Angel, nor any of the characters belonging to the show.

**Warning:** Contains spoilers to the end of the anime.

- . - . - . - . –

Krad was gone. A mere week earlier, Satoshi would have greeted such a statement with uncharacteristic glee. He would have smiled and laughed as he had never done in his fourteen years of life. For once he would indulge himself with frivolous actions and think freely about whatever he wished to think. All because that annoying, nagging, sadistic voice at the back of his head was no longer there.

And now, he regarded this thought of being free from Krad with solemn confusion. The glee he should have felt was replaced by loneliness.

Was that even possible? Could Satoshi actually be _missing_ his curse? Inconceivable!

Krad was a curse, nothing more, nothing less, as far as Satoshi was concerned. He existed to hurt and destroy the fragile structure of his host's psyche. And he had nearly succeeded. The endless flirting, the taunting, the whisper of loathingly sweet comments that lurked at the back of his mind, all tore at Satoshi day by day.

Krad had awakened feelings which Satoshi could never have considered. Never before had he felt such hatred for a single person. Never before had he despised someone with all of his being, effectively shutting himself from the outside world just to deny that someone the pleasure of human contact.

And he had never known the comfort and friendship that he felt with Daisuke.

Inadvertently, Krad's purpose had failed. Through his teasing and rather forceful possessions of Satoshi's body, Krad had encouraged Satoshi to seek outside aid.

He had found it in the form of his sworn rival, Niwa Daisuke.

As disconcerting as the thought was, had Krad not cursed Satoshi with his presence, the boy would never had known the true happiness one felt with a friend watching your back.

Satoshi pondered all this as he strode down the street which led away from Azumano No. 2 and in the general direction of his lonely apartment. His bag, full of books on topics he had learned long ago, was slung over his shoulder. It was heavier than usual, Satoshi's tutoring responsibilities finally catching up with him.

A multitude of people crushed him as he attempted to pass through the busy streets. He stumbled once, bumping into another person, who gave him a glare and continued walking. Satoshi straightened and as he began walking again, caught a flash of unnervingly familiar long blonde hair causing him crane his neck over the crowd. He saw nothing and was rewarded by another heavy person colliding into him as they passed.

He shook such irrational thoughts from his head and, still slightly shaken, made his way home to his apartment.

He closed and locked the door behind him, mind still pondering the earlier events. Why had he frozen out on the street? His curse was gone. He was sealed away, and judging from Niwa's melancholy attitude, would not be coming back.

The red-head had been moping around the school hall for a week, his usually happy demeanor dampened by the loss of his curse. The elder Harada, Riku, spent nearly every moment with him, feeding him home-cooked meals and generally just being there for him.

Even one who had grown up with such twisted relationships as Satoshi could recognize that Niwa was becoming clingy as a result of his loss. And even Satoshi could tell it was unhealthy.

Perhaps, Satoshi thought, having a hateful curse was a benefit. Sure, he had grown up with hatred in his heart and an apathetic mask upon his face. But in some respects, he was far better prepared to face the loss of his curse.

Niwa had grown far too comfortable with Dark's presence. He had come to love his curse, though his feelings for Dark were undoubtedly different from those he had for the elder Harada. But, either way, the loss of the one being who had been privy to one's every inner thought must have been heartbreaking.

Not that Satoshi would ever know.

Everything about Dark was the opposite of Krad. Dark was shadow, Krad was light. Dark was noble (to an extent¾he had a code of honor, at any rate), while Krad cared little for human life outside of his host's own. Dark was warmth, a nurturing, if sometimes irritating, entity who cared genuinely for his host. And Krad? Krad was the representation of that icy wasteland where Niwa had found him attempting that ritual, locked deep inside his own mind. Cold, unforgiving, and icily perfect.

Satoshi sunk onto the bed, resting his head tiredly on the pillow, though unable to fall asleep just yet.

But, perhaps the arrangement of host and curse was best. After all, Satoshi would never have had the patience to deal with Dark, nor could Niwa have withstood Krad's treachery.

And that led to a train of thought that disturbed Satoshi greatly. Dark was the perfect match for Niwa because they were mirror images of one another. Somewhere inside Niwa lurked the same sort of personality which Dark personified. And if that was true, could the same be said for Krad and Satoshi?

Surely not! Satoshi knew he was different from his curse. Satoshi would never have spent centuries attempting to kill this one being over some meaningless feud which spanned for generations. He was not possessive, nor was he conniving or manipulative.

Although, perhaps he was. If some small part of Dark was contained within Niwa, who was he to say that some part of Krad wasn't also held within him. Or, if not that, maybe he would have become like his curse if he had experienced the same things as Krad. He had never really learned what his curse's life had been like before he had come to Satoshi. He had never cared.

How ironic that he only wished for knowledge after the object of his pondering had been ripped away.

Now, he was on his own, as he had wished for so many years, and he was desperately confused. With Krad, at least his body had a purpose, even if it was only to be a channel for his curse. Niwa had told him to live, to live for a love he may someday know. That was no purpose for a Hikari. Nor for a Hiwatari. Living for love was pointless for one who had hardened his heart to the world.

Would he have been happier if he had succeeded in ending his life? No. Would he have been more content if Krad had not been sealed? Probably not, but surely he would have gotten used to it. Niwa's were the ones who changed things and Hikari's adapted to those changes.

But, Niwa had changed the destinies of both families.

At least before, he knew where he stood. He was loved by Krad, used by Hiwatari Kei, not particularly liked by Dark, and pitied by Niwa. It was far simpler that way. Satoshi didn't have to think about what he should do with the rest of his life. He didn't have to worry about anything beyond age fourteen. It was his decision that at age fourteen, he would die. And he had gone about trying to make it so, only to be stopped by Niwa Daisuke.

This was far beyond the future he had accepted for himself. It had never seemed possible that Krad would leave and that he would live. So, he floundered with this new life, reaching for the sense of stability he once had.

He _needed_ structure desperately. He needed an enemy to fight, a purpose to live for.

He needed his curse.

And that realization alone was enough to convince himself that he desperately needed rest. Obviously if he was entertaining such thoughts, he was more tired than he'd previously thought.

- . - . - . - . –

Just a short, rather pointless musing fic. I may continue, but only if my idea develops a little more. Feedback would be much appreciated, especially since this is my first venture into writing in this fandom.


	2. Chapter 2

**Aftershocks – part II**

**By:** Shunsoku

**Disclaimer:** See first chapter.

- . - . - . - . –

Niwa Daisuke, contrary to popular beliefs, was not completely clueless about human affairs. He could tell by the way Hiwatari's shoulders slumped and from the glazed, half-there glare that the boy sent at the world that he was not the only one suffering.

Though, Daisuke doubted that the blue-haired boy felt like a piece of his own soul had been forcibly wrenched from his chest. This feeling of aching loneliness reverberated through him, shaking up his thoughts and forcing him to dwell on affairs he'd just as soon forget.

Not that he would ever dare to tell Riku any of this. She was worried enough about him simply because his appetite had decreased. He didn't want to distress her more.

After all, being around her was comforting. She could dull his loss to the point where he could barely feel it, and for that, he loved her. He loved the fact that he could seek her comfort when depressed and that in turn, she would first come to him when she was feeling down.

But, a part of him was gone now. Nothing could be the same, he convinced himself. From now on, every moment spent with her would be tainted with the memory of the time Dark had used him for a host.

And this thought hit him harder than any other. The perverted comments at the back of his mind were gone permanently. His consciousness was silent, without the pleasant claustrophobia he had come to attribute to the joint ownership of his body.

He rolled off the bed lazily and sat down before the mirror on his desk. His own face stared back at him. The reflection was disheveled looking, with bags under teary eyes and tousled hair. The figure's hand lifted to brush salty tears from where they gathered on its lashes.

There was no smirking face staring back at him, no purple-haired figure to converse with.

He had never truly considered what it would be like to lose Dark. But, in retrospect, he should have considered it more. After all, he had been helping Hiwatari rid himself of Krad, which would in turn seal Dark. And yet, he had never actually expected to lose him.

He noticed that his eyes were growing rapidly more and more watery as his train of thought continued, he tore away from the mirror and collapsed back onto the bed. He had homework which he should definitely be doing, especially since now his mother could not send him in a note saying that he had "been up last night" and therefore couldn't do any work. But, he couldn't summon the energy to do so.

Maybe this was why Hiwatari always seemed to brood so much. It was painful mentally but it didn't require movement or indeed very much motivation at all. Daisuke found it hard, especially now, to keep smiling. But Riku expected his smile and so he gave it to her, even when it hurt him.

Daisuke pounded his head into the pillow, attempting to stop himself from getting more depressed. This did him no good! How long was he going to put up with being sad about Dark being sealed? The thief would not appreciate this attitude at all, Daisuke was sure. Riku, his mother, father, and grandfather wouldn't either.

Someone had to solve this little issue of his.

He resolved to do something about it the next morning at school, which eased his mind and allowed him to slip off into sleep.

- . - . - . - . –

Sorry, it's shorter than the last one. For some reason I can get into Satoshi's head much easier than Daisuke's. I think I'll finish this up with one last chapter to sort of tie everything together. Thanks to everwhite,CelestialGlowEquivalence, and Kyuseisha no Hikarifor your wonderful reviews. As always, feedback would be much appreciated.


	3. Chapter 3

**Aftershocks – part III**

**By:** Shunsoku

**Disclaimer:** See first chapter.

- . - . - . - . –

"Hiwatari-kun!"

Satoshi turned to face the lightly panting red-head who had called his name. The other boy had bags under his eyes, much like his own, Satoshi suspected. Not to mention the fact that in a moment of forgetfulness, Satoshi had left his glasses back at his apartment and Daisuke obviously hadn't brushed his hair for at least a day.

They looked quite the pair.

"Yes?" he questioned tiredly.

"I---," Daisuke began and then faltered as he studied his companion's cool face. His eyes studied his shoes intently.

Satoshi understood what Niwa couldn't say, perhaps because the same thoughts had been running through his head. They had originally been friends just because of Krad and Dark, and now that they were gone, Niwa wasn't sure if Satoshi would want to be his friend any more. And try as they might to convince themselves, there was not and never would be anyone who would understand what it felt like to lose the other half of their souls.

Maybe it was time for new beginnings. After all, with their curses gone, they would have to move on with their lives sooner or later. And Daisuke and Satoshi both couldn't help thinking that by continuing to wallow in self-pity, they were only prolonging their agony.

Daisuke's eyes were uncharacteristically serious as he stuck his hand out, "I'm Niwa Daisuke."

Satoshi hesitated, and then shook the proffered hand, "Hikari Satoshi."

"Nice to meet you, Satoshi-kun." A smile.

"Yeah."

This wouldn't completely cure the ache of loss in both, but it would be enough for now.

- . - . - . - . –

**FIN**

- . - . - . - . –

This one's even shorter than the last one, but there really wasn't all that much left for me to say. This was never meant to be a romance. I am a diehard SatoDai fan (not to mention KradSato), but I just could not find it in my heart to force the two into a romantic relationship in lieu of the events. If you'd like to, you may think of this as being a step towards that romance, but I certainly will never write it.

Thank you ever so much to CelestialGlowEquivalence, Kukiko, hamgirl,Kyuseisha no Hikari, and everwhite for reviewing.


End file.
